mr taxi driverThis is the default greeting for every merry customer who hops into a cab.
It works best if it’s roared at regular intervals throughout the journey.
This is usually reserved for drivers who are immigrants to our fair shores and often follows a squinty look at the name tag on the dashboard.
It is typically bookended with a “do you like it here” and “where are you from?”
Despite having just learned their host’s name, many will then revert to the default “MR TAXI DRIVER”.
Photocall Ireland
This can be alternated with:
Are you on for the night?
Just started?
Flickr/Ian Murphy
No problem, as long as you realise I’m going to keep the meter running.
Cue 3 extra people trying to squeeze into a full capacity taxi, after a 17 minute wait of course.
This is a red herring. They’re definitely going to get sick.
Chomp, chomp, chomp.
How dare they not appreciate your Dire Straits ‘Brothers in Arms’ cassette/Bill Cullen ‘Penny Apples’ audiobook/Adrian Kennedy Phone Show.
via Etsy
No. And I’m not trying to swizz you. I genuinely don’t have change.
Flickr/GunnarWrobel
After stopping at the ATM they will definitely produce a fifty.
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