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IN A WORLD of ever-changing and advancing technology, you’d think we’d all be on hoverboards by now tbh.
Footpaths should be conveyor belts. Teleportation should have replaced air travel by now. Doctors should be replaced by supermarket self-service check-out machines.
OK, well maybe the last one is a little too far. Regardless, here are some fantastical inventions that every Irish woman would love to become a reality.
A giant magnet that finds rogue hair pins that have ended up on the floor in every room of your gaff.
A traffic lights system in pubs letting you know when the best time to use the bathroom is to avoid inevitable queues.
An app that alerts you to when your mother-in-law’s birthday is approaching. (Additional in-app purchase of geo-locating the nearest petrol station so you can grab a bunch of flowers on the way to hers for Sunday lunch.)
The seven most wonderful words an Irish woman will ever hear: bras that are fleecy on the inside.
Don’t we all, Frank?
Ever heard of Shazam? It’s the app that lets you put a name to that song that’s been rattling around your head for days. Well – brace yourself. A Shazam for smells. Never have to wonder what lovely perfume that lady in the hairdressers was wearing ever again.
Mary Poppins had one, and that film was made in like 1964 or something. Where are out deceptively roomy clutch bags? Mini and cute on the outside, capable of holding 1kg of miscellaneous crap on the inside. We’re sick of carrying small suitcases just because we want to touch up our make-up once a day, bring our wallets, and hang on to receipts and bits of tissue from the past 12 months. Is that so hard?
There’s one great invention for women that IS real. Introducing the all-new Ladyball, the GAA ball specially designed for a lady’s game. It’s softer, for the woman’s touch, and fashion driven to suit a gal’s style. Play like the lady you are with Ladyball! Find out more at theladyball.ie. Why should the boys have all the fun?
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That’s a sentence
@David Harries: life without possibility of parole would be better but 40 years is a start! Irish system could learn! Start with doubling most sentences given seems about right
@kevinhunt101: The problem with the Irish System is that there is an over emphasis on custodial sentences for non-violent/serious crimes. If more people were given suspend sentences which involved monitoring and work for the state then it would (I) potentially self-fund itself (ii) reduce the overcrowding problem with our prisons.
This would then free up the necessary space for the people who are an actual danger to society to be imprisoned for longer.
@Thn: agree, large fines and compulsory payments (taken from income source) for non violent crimes need to be implemented! Free up prison space for non violent crimes! Also more solitary confinement for violent and repeat offenders. Planned murder should be min 40 years no possibility of parole, no good behavior taken into account, no good family person etc etc! Multiple murders should be death penalty, reduce costs to state. Are they really sorry, no if they committed 2 or more murders.
He had molested the girl who survived when she was 13 but her family chose to believe him
Some down right sick puppies out there. Well done for sentence handed down.
Should be out to death. Simple.
What a beautiful young woman. What an utterly sick, monster. A life sentence seems generous
@Dave O Keeffe: yeah Dave sexist pig monster
@Sandra O’Fucáif: on a different note Sandra are u still claiming that there are thousands of Egyptian Copts living here like illegally
@johnp: I think that Sandra need a new avatar.
@Sandra O’Fucáif: oh move along
The Chinese have the right idea. Why keep this bit of trash alive when one in the back of the head would release millions of Pounds to improve the Health Service !
Really really evil, this guy should just be shot.
What a beaitiful woman and waste of a lfe.. sentencing is just and we need to review our sentences here which is a joke tbh.
That fella was no addition to any country !
40 years is a joke. Should be tortured for 40 years
Just kill the sick f##ker
@john: and do it nice and slowly.
Ain’t Multiculturalism great.
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