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Here's nine things you may do that make people instantly dislike you

And being too nice is one of them…

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THERE ARE PLENTY of ways to turn people off.

In fact, most of them don’t require much effort. All it takes is one look at your social media activity or a casual in-person introduction to make someone realize they just don’t want to spend time with you.

We’ve rounded up some of the most common social turn-offs online and in person, as well as how to avoid them. Read on and see which ones you’ve been guilty of.

1. Sharing too many photos on Facebook

ap AP AP

You might be eager to share snapshots of your honeymoon, cousin’s graduation, and dog dressed in a Halloween costume, all within a 24-hour period.

But research has found that posting too many photos on Facebook can hurt your real-life relationships.

“This is because people, other than very close friends and relatives, don’t seem to relate well to those who constantly share photos of themselves,” lead study author David Houghton, PhD, said in a release.

Specifically, friends don’t like it when you’ve got too many photos of family, and relatives don’t like it when you’ve got too many photos of friends.

As Ben Marder, PhD, another author on the study, put it: “Be cautious when sharing and think how it will be perceived by all the others who may see it. Although sharing is a great way to better relationships, it can also damage them.”

2. Having too many or too few Facebook friends

facebook

In one study, researchers asked college students to look at fictional Facebook profiles and decide how much they liked the profiles’ owners. The study took place in 2008, and the students had about 300 friends each.

Results showed that the “sweet spot” for likeability was about 300 friends. Likeability ratings were lowest when a profile owner had only about 100 friends, and almost as low when they had more than 300 friends.

As for why 300-plus friends could be a turn-off, the study authors write, “Individuals with too many friends may appear to be focusing too much on Facebook, friending out of desperation rather than popularity.”

On the other hand, the researchers acknowledge that if you look at a population where the most common number of Facebook friends is 1,000, the sweet spot for likeability could be 1,000.

Keep in mind, though, that one survey found that the average number of Facebook friends among adult users was 338 in 2014.

Interestingly, the study also found that participants weren’t consciously aware that they liked people less when they had too many or too few Facebook friends.

3. Disclosing something extremely personal early on in a relationship

fb1 Francisco Osorio Francisco Osorio

In general, people like each other more after they’ve traded confidences. In fact, self-disclosure is one of the best ways to make friends as an adult.

But psychologists say that disclosing something too intimate — say, the fact that your sister is having an extramarital affair — while you’re still getting to know someone can make you seem insecure and decrease your likeability.

The key is to get personal without getting overly personal. As one study led by Susan Sprecher at Illinois State University suggests, simply sharing details about your hobbies and your favorite childhood memories can make you seem warmer and more likeable.

4. Asking someone questions without talking about yourself at all

pedro Pedro Ribeiro Simões Pedro Ribeiro Simões

That same study by Susan Sprecher found an important caveat to the idea that self-disclosure predicts closeness: It has to be mutual. People generally like you less if you don’t reciprocate when they disclose something intimate.

In the study, unacquainted participants either engaged in back-and-forth self-disclosure or took turns self-disclosing for 12 minutes each while the other listened.

Results showed that participants in the back-and-forth group liked each other significantly more.

As the authors write: “Although shy or socially anxious people may ask questions of the other to distract attention from themselves, our research shows that this is not a good strategy for relationship initiation. Both participants in an interaction need to disclose to generate mutual closeness and liking.”

5. Posting a close-up profile photo

bi Business Insider Business Insider

If your LinkedIn profile features an image of your face practically smushed up against the camera, you’d be wise to change it.

Research suggests that faces photographed from just 45 centimeters — about 1.5 feet — away are considered less trustworthy, attractive, and competent than faces photographed from 135 centimeters, about 4.5 feet, away.

6. Hiding your emotions

emotions Andy Morales Andy Morales

Research suggests that letting your real feelings come through is a better strategy for getting people to like you than bottling it all up.

In one study, researchers videotaped people watching the fake-orgasm scene from the movie “When Harry Met Sally” and a sad scene from the movie “The Champ”. In some cases, the actors were instructed to react naturally; in another they were instructed to suppress their emotions.

College students then watched the four versions of the videos. Researchers measured how much the students would be interested in befriending the people in the videos, as well as their assessments of the personalities of the people in the videos.

Results showed that suppressors were judged less likeable — as well as less extroverted and agreeable — than people who emoted naturally.

It probably goes back to that idea of reciprocation. The researchers write: “People… do not pursue close relationships indiscriminately — they probably look for people who are likely to reciprocate their investments. So when perceivers detect that someone is hiding their emotions, they may interpret that as a disinterest in the things that emotional expression facilitates — closeness, social support, and interpersonal coordination.”

7. Acting too nice

toonice

You might think you’ll win people over by acting altruistic, but science suggests otherwise.

In a 2010 study, researchers at Washington State University gave college students points that they could keep or redeem for meal-service vouchers. Participants were told that they were playing in groups of five — even though four of them were manipulations by the researchers — and were told that giving up points would boost the group’s chance of getting a monetary reward.

Some of the “fake” participants would give up lots of points and only take a few vouchers. As it turns out, most participants said they wouldn’t want to work with their unselfish teammate again.

Some participants said the unselfish teammate made them look bad; others suspected they had ulterior motives.

The real-world implication here is that you don’t want to be the coworker who always agrees to get pizza for the meeting or fix the printer when it’s jammed. Instead, it’s OK to say no sometimes, so long as you explain why you can’t commit.

8. Humblebragging

shutterstock_120200761 Shutterstock / auremar Shutterstock / auremar / auremar

To impress friends and potential employers, avoid complimenting yourself and trying to disguise it as self-criticism.

This behavior, otherwise known as “humblebragging”, could be a turn-off, according to a recent study.

In the study, college students were asked to write down how they’d answer a question about their biggest weakness in a job interview. Results showed that more than three-quarters of participants humblebragged, usually about being a perfectionist or working too hard.

Yet independent research assistants said they’d be more likely to hire the participants who were honest, and found them significantly more likeable. Those students said things like, “I’m not always the best at staying organized” and “sometimes I overreact to situations”.

Another alternative is to talk about weaknesses that don’t directly relate to the job — for example, a fear of public speaking if you’re applying for a writing position.

9. Getting too nervous

shutterstock_201024185 Shutterstock / PathDoc Shutterstock / PathDoc / PathDoc

Never let ‘em see — or smell — you sweat. Research suggests that the odour of your nervous sweat may subconsciously influence people’s judgements of your personality.

Back in 2013, researchers at the Monell Chemical Senses Center had participants watch videos of women in everyday situations, like working in an office or taking care of a child.

While watching the videos, they sniffed three kinds of sweat in a row: sweat that someone had produced while exercising, sweat produced during a stressful situation, and sweat produced during a stressful situation that had been covered up with antiperspirant.

Participants were then asked to rate the women on how competent, confident, and trustworthy they seemed.

Results showed that participants rated the women lower on all measures when they smelled the stress-induced sweat. When they smelled the stress sweat that had been covered up with antiperspirant, they rated the women more positively.

Bottom line? If you’re prone to nervous sweating, be liberal with the deodorant.

- Shana Lebowitz

Read: Four things you should do right away when you get into work everyday

Read: ‘Money can’t buy life’: The last words of 18 famous people

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    Mute Desmond Wisley
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    May 21st 2015, 4:08 PM

    He looks like Rolf Harris

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    Mute Paul Doyle
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    May 21st 2015, 4:10 PM

    Ha ha, never eating KFC again,

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    Mute Paul Doyle
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    May 21st 2015, 4:15 PM

    And one more thing, IMO why they don’t sell curry sauce is beyond me, that gravy is a poor substitute for curry with ur chicken

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    Mute Ben Coughlan
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    May 21st 2015, 5:49 PM

    Paul, You beautiful man, you’re completely correct.

    Their food is nasty anyway like, but the lack of curry sauce is unforgivable.

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    Mute Alien8
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    May 21st 2015, 7:00 PM

    Their gravy was often the only reason for going there. I recall many the time going to KFC and coming out with fingers burned like they were in a hot bath full of chicken, half cooked fries and MSG…. mmm…

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    Mute Niall
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    May 21st 2015, 9:25 PM

    I only tell you one time. Don’t fcuk me Eric……. don’t you ever try to fcuk me!

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    Mute josecafe
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    May 21st 2015, 10:02 PM

    Buzz off bozo the kfc gravy is nice !

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    Mute Skippy
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    May 21st 2015, 4:13 PM

    Denis o brien wins again, and gets a gagging order against any reporting of his corruption……….discusss

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    Mute Mr T
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    May 21st 2015, 4:24 PM

    No. But do you like kfc?

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    Mute CreditTiger
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    May 21st 2015, 10:26 PM

    DojiFone Denis has more spicy state secrets up his sleeves than Colonel Rolf has had chicken dinners!!

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    Mute Paul Doyle
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    May 21st 2015, 4:08 PM

    Looks a bit like Rolf Harris

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    Mute Mark Nolan
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    May 21st 2015, 4:21 PM

    Id consider going to KFC again if they place was clean & the chicken was hot!

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    Mute Neal Ireland Hello
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    May 21st 2015, 5:43 PM

    Or if they started having nice food

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    Mute Brian Gormley
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    May 21st 2015, 4:53 PM

    A fella was telling me that his son had his head wrecked to take him to McDonalds so he told him “if you can spell McDonalds ill take ye” so the young fella said ” ah fu.k it we’ll go to KFC

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    Mute John Ryan
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    May 21st 2015, 4:55 PM

    Hillbillys in Cork after a feed of pints.Nothing KFC has to offer even comes close.

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    Mute tmwtbc
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    May 21st 2015, 5:01 PM

    I’ve been to the Hillbillys in Fairview a few times. Decent stuff.

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    Mute John Ryan
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    May 21st 2015, 5:22 PM

    And they have curry sauce.

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    Mute Ken McCarthy
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    May 21st 2015, 4:10 PM

    If I want to wrap my mouth around breasts, legs & thighs, I’ll have a night in. Cheers Colonel.

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    Mute kalpol
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    May 21st 2015, 4:50 PM

    So how you getting on since ya moved back in with your ma?

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    Mute Ken McCarthy
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    May 21st 2015, 6:06 PM

    Good now. Your sis feels right at home too.

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    Mute kalpol
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    May 21st 2015, 6:17 PM

    I dont have any sisters… but I have a fat brother, could be him?

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    Mute Alan mulvey
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    May 21st 2015, 4:10 PM

    Eat it in bray a few years ago and never again it was awful

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    Mute Negativebird
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    May 21st 2015, 4:15 PM

    Have to agree…absolutely revolting it was.However,you should try the one in blanch,it’s a bit better.

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    Mute marcus o reilly
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    May 21st 2015, 4:52 PM

    I hate parking in the retail carpark beside kfc. The smell is nice for about 2 seconds and then fell sick from the smell.

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    Mute Deco James Connolly
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    May 21st 2015, 5:38 PM

    Hope you didn’t hit your head when you fell .

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    Mute Brian Power
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    May 21st 2015, 4:16 PM

    Anytime I go to McDonald’s its packed dont see it slowing down

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    Mute kalpol
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    May 21st 2015, 4:19 PM

    Its nigella they need not a Rolf Harris lookalike.
    The food gives you ebola side effects

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    Mute The Man With No Name
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    May 21st 2015, 4:13 PM

    No taco fries, no business.

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    Mute The Todd
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    May 21st 2015, 4:16 PM

    I genuinely read that headline as “KFC is bringing back chicken” haha then I thought, that will never happen

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    Mute Bert McCann
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    May 21st 2015, 4:51 PM

    That’s definitely Ronan Collins…….

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    Mute Philip Cooper
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    May 21st 2015, 4:52 PM

    Tiny little chickens killed, plucked, covered in spicy batter and crumbs and deliciously gobbled up.

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    Mute The Todd
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    May 21st 2015, 4:57 PM

    Or chickens with no eyes or feathers being genetically processed in a lab, there’s a few documentaries about it. Horrid stuff

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    Mute Kárl
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    May 21st 2015, 7:55 PM

    Is it really wise to use someone who looks like a white plantation owner from over a century ago to promote chicken in a basket (or is modern alternative)?

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    Mute CreditTiger
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    May 21st 2015, 10:29 PM

    All that’s missing is the salty melon balls!

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    Mute Kevin Whyte
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    May 21st 2015, 4:56 PM

    Best of them, all unhealthy but KFC is the best tasting, some of their outlets need a good cleaning, the operators need to be better supervised by KVC, I walked out of Bundoron last year because it was not near clean, I have always found Athlone great

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    Mute tmwtbc
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    May 21st 2015, 5:12 PM

    The one in Carrick-on-Shannon is the best I’ve seen. Spotless, and the girl there remembered my order as I passed though (for work) every few days.

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    Mute Fran Cowzer
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    May 21st 2015, 7:36 PM

    They kept him alive with 11 secret herbs and spices

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    Mute zacaramanta
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    May 21st 2015, 4:24 PM

    Everythg in bray Is shttttt mc Donald’s Eddie spocrketts it’s un believable shtt
    Go to Dundrum taste like the ritz

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    Mute Kevin Whelan
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    May 21st 2015, 10:19 PM

    He’s looking alright for a man that was on ice for 20 years

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    Mute Sarah Clifford
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    May 21st 2015, 7:47 PM

    They can resurrect the messiah for all I care. I still will never eat in that kip

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    Mute Christine Hanway
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    May 21st 2015, 10:54 PM

    Hillbillys pisses all over KFC… All der missing from der menu is the hot wings an unlike KFC they’re nearly too generous with the chips.. New one on Walkinstown roundabout is tops

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    Mute Paddy Devaney
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    May 21st 2015, 4:31 PM

    He won’t be around long with a cough like that

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    Mute Michael Sands
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    May 22nd 2015, 3:34 AM

    HACCP comes to mind then, extra flavouring?

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    Mute Dean Anderson
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    May 21st 2015, 11:58 PM

    That’s one of the worst ads I’ve ever seen, worse than McD’s new Hamburglar. That eejit playing the Colonel gave me the creeps.

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    Mute Tom Healy
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    May 23rd 2015, 8:56 AM

    Looks like a creepy Rolf Harris
    Eric fail KFC

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    Mute Michael Sands
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    May 22nd 2015, 3:33 AM

    Wasn’t he an awful racist?

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