BABIES BORN DURING 2020 have been welcomed into a strange new world.
For the family of Kyle, Max and Zach Byrne Ryan, who are celebrating their first birthday on New Year’s Day, the pandemic will not be their longest memory of the last year.
The three boys were born to Annmarie Byrne Ryan and her husband David on the first day of 2020, and are a set of rare spontaneous triplets, which means that the multiple pregnancy arose without medical intervention.
Kyle, Max and Zach spent the first month of their lives in a neonatal intensive care unit before coming home in February just a few weeks before Ireland was hit by Covid-19.
“All our help immediately stopped as soon as lockdown hit,” said Annmarie, speaking to TheJournal.ie.
“We obviously couldn’t have any outside help coming in. The boys were premature. They were at risk. And to be honest, I think everybody was very afraid.”
Before restrictions on household visitors came into effect, Annmarie and David had the help of their parents and sisters with the newborn triplets and their 2-year-old son, Mason, but as the country slowed down, they faced into months of caring for the four small children alone with the help of Annmarie’s eldest daughter, Shauna.
“We were saved that she was there. An extra pair of hands around the house means so much, but obviously, she’s an 18-year-old, she’s on lockdown, she wants to sleep all day too,” Annmarie laughed.
“I have to say hand on heart, we would have been lost without her.”
Annmarie and I spoke over Zoom during the precious hour of the boys’ lunchtime nap. She tries to stick to a daily routine for them like clockwork, but with the three of them, it doesn’t always go to plan.
“The boys are getting a lot of teeth at once, so they’re not sleeping all through the night for us at all anymore. They’re not awake screaming crying or anything, but they still are waking up and they want a little bit of cuddles or their soother. It’s constant broken sleep, and with three of them, it takes its toll on you,” Annmarie said.
“To be fair, they go to bed at about seven o’clock, so that’s brilliant. We get a few hours to ourselves in the evening before they start constantly waking up. It’s amazing what you can get done – the amount of laundry that needs to be done and everything!”
Although the triplets are identical, there’s no mistaking their distinct personalities, with a smiler, a troublemaking charmer, and a cuddler all in the mix.
“Kyle, he’s the eldest. He’s just a little smiler, he’s a little giggler, and he’s just constantly happy,” Annmarie said. He’s the first to go asleep and he’s the last to wake up so he’s the little model child.”
The middle child, Max, is her troublemaker. “Even in my scans, he was the one that was jumping in front of the other triplets. He’s just a little charmer, so he’s going to break my heart I think, he’s going to get away with a lot.”
“And then Zach – he just wants to be cuddled. He just cries if you put him down and he just wants to be cuddled. He is the baby triplet and he just wants to be babied.”
I do love that they’re all so different. I think that’s important, especially for us, myself and David, to remember as parents. Yes, they are triplets, but they are individuals too.”
Their bubbly characters shine through on Annmarie’s Instagram account, where she shares photos of the three boys and updates on their progress.
Annmarie didn’t start out with intentions of making an Instagram, but her daughter, Shauna, set up the account for her back when the newborns were still in the NICU as a way to connect with other parents of triplets.
“She set it up as a support network, because although triplets are rare, you’d be surprised how many mammy triplet friends I’ve made on Instagram,” Annmarie said.
“It’s lovely, people are very supportive. I think people like to see little updates of them because I love seeing all the other triplets as well, and twins or even just a solo baby, you know, pictures of a baby just cheer everybody up I think.”
Instagram has provided a platform for Annmarie to stay connected with the world and share stories of the triplets at a time where introducing them to friends and family has been challenging.
Although they were born in January, there are members of Annmarie and David’s close families that are still yet to meet the triplets.
In April, the three babies were due to be christened on the couple’s first wedding anniversary, but the christening had to be called off because of the restrictions.
“We did get them christened eventually after the lockdown ended in July, and that was so nice because members of my family that are close relatives and David’s family finally got to meet the boys that never got to meet them previously because of lockdown,” Annmarie said.
She said that seeing the triplets turn one is “emotional” because they “still actually haven’t met a lot of people, believe it or not, so it’s weird”.
“It’s been the longest year but the quickest in the strangest way. It’s the longest year for me mentally and personally, but it’s just as quick for them, because they’re thriving so much.”
Coming up to this time last year, Annmarie and David were attending regular scans together, but the healthcare landscape has shifted significantly since then for expectant parents who have faced restrictions imposed in hospitals.
“I was scanned every week or every two weeks, and if David wasn’t allowed in with me I think that’s a whole different other story. For women now not having their partners with them, that’s just horrible, and especially for the NICU wards,” Annmarie said.
“With NICU, when the boys were in there, we both went in together constantly twice a day, and if they were born during lockdown and David wasn’t allowed in, I think I would have crumbled mentally big time.”
Caring for a newborn is challenging at the best of times, but caring for three newborns and a toddler with limited support available has brought unique complexities for Annmarie and David.
With Mason being so young as well, mam guilt is a huge thing for me because you’re worried are they all getting your undivided attention in equal amounts.
“For instance, the ice cream man pulled up there yesterday and Mason wanted an ice cream. I was at home on my own with the boys at the time and I couldn’t physically make it out on time to get him an ice cream by strapping the three boys in the buggy.”
As the triplets celebrate their first birthday on New Year’s Day, 2021, Annmarie is looking towards the future and the hope of a return to some kind of familiar world.
“I’m looking forward to a little bit of normality please God for everybody because let’s face it, 2020 has been a year for everyone to remember.”
“It wasn’t all bad for me – it kicked off to a great start.”
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