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IN AN ERA dominated by social media, we are constantly bombarded with images, peddling the notion that other people are living lives that are vastly more exciting, more glamorous and happier than our own. This may be particularly true during the festive season, when social media goes into overdrive, filling our feeds with images of the ideal Christmas.
While it’s traditionally a period of celebration, for many Christmas can be a source of anxiety. Some of us will be looking forward to time off work, but others may be impacted by increased family conflict, alcohol misuse, financial concerns or loneliness. This time of year can be tough and often it’s made worse by the underlying assumption that you should be having a great time.
Add a Facebook feed that’s stuffed to the virtual seams with carefully crafted images of idyllic Christmas scenes, and what’s left is a recipe for annoyance and suffering for many. So what can one do when the festive season feels more like a stress fest than a haven of festive joy?
Try limit your time on social media
We live in a culture that places a high value on social media so this one might seem like a challenge, but it’s the simplest solution for those of us comparing ourselves to others on the likes of Facebook.
If you don’t want to go cold turkey (pardon the Christmas pun) by deleting or completely ignoring your social media accounts, try limiting your online activity to a few minutes a day.
Keep Perspective
“The reason we struggle with insecurity is because we compare our behind-the-scenes with everyone else’s highlight reel.”
This quote from Steve Furtick reminds us that perspective is paramount, especially when it comes to what we see on social media. Not a single person is going to take a photo of a singed Christmas ham, a tangled mess of fairy lights or a pair of bickering family members, let alone share it on Facebook. But that doesn’t mean it’s not happening.
Social media is like a family photograph album made public, with all the best bits put forward for the world to see. It is important that we recognise it for what it is, a carefully constructed snapshot and not an accurate representation of real life.
Be kind to yourself
The nucleus of the Christmas spirit is caring and compassion for others, but it is crucial that we extend this kindness to ourselves most of all.
If you’re having a stressful festive season, there’s every chance that plenty of others are too. Give up on self-criticism and unhelpful virtual comparisons. Allow yourself to relax and do some things you enjoy.
Connect with others
Christmas is largely thought of as a time to spend with friends and family, but for those who do not have this option, it can be a solitary time of year. This loneliness can be made more acute by constantly seeing images of happy families on social media.
If you are alone this time of year and would rather not be, think of ways in which you can reach out to people who might also be in your position. Volunteering is an excellent way to spend time and has been shown to have positive effects on mental health, both for the volunteers and the service users.
Whether it be staying in touch with loved ones abroad or reconnecting with old friends, it would be unfair not to recognise the benefits of social media. It can increase our connectivity and be used to revive or preserve relationships.
Gone is the era of the “American wake” when a loved one moving continent meant rarely or sometimes never seeing them again. There are teenagers alive at this moment who have never known a world in which social media did not exist and studies have shown its effect on mental health to be both positive and negative. However, like most things, moderation is key.
So if this festive season sees you stressed and anxious, remember to be kind to yourself. Maybe step away from the phone or laptop and go for a walk. Eat mince pies and watch a cheesy Christmas movie, and remember not to compare your behind the scenes to someone else’s highlight reel.
Amy Plant is a counsellor/psychotherapist practicing in Dublin. She works extensively with depression, anxiety, anger issues, sexuality (LGBTQ), grief, low self-esteem, relationship issues and stress, www.amyplanttherapy.com.
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Solving the climate crisis and emissions is really about making the majority reduce their consumption through using less or paying more taxes so the elite can carry on as normal. If the govt or the world as a whole were serious then we would each have a carbon allowance, but how would that work, far easier to tax the lower income people on fuel for their cars,houses etc than ask the wealthy to stop flying private jets, driving cars that do 20mpg and leave a carbon footprint that’s massive compared to ordinary people.
If the ordinary car is such a threat, why are people being asked to go electric when to do so would either bankrupt them or mean they simply couldn’t afford a car. Its simply not going to happen unless somebody is making a fortune out of it.
@Rex Tilson: absolutely. A survey in the U.K. found that the top 15% of flyers took 70% of flights in that year (2014). Their Carbon costs are even higher because the top 15% fly more long haul and private jets. 50% of people didn’t fly that year but they did fly every second or third year.
Increasing carbon taxes would have little effect in any one year as it would penalise the people taking only 30% of the flights. Most of top 15% are rich enough to continue flying.
A voucher allowing one short haul return per person would massively reduce those flights while not affecting the bottom 85% of flyers who take one or none every year. Maybe corporations can have a few more vouchers. Otherwise – zoom.
At the very least we should ban private jets – are we all in this together or not.
There are chasms between Government words/plans and their actual actions, from health, education, infrastructure, etc decades of incompetence and cronyism.
The climate change advisory council?? Money for old rope for sure isn’t it. Anyway we the people soldier on. Chin up folks.
What’s telling for me, is the amount of rubish that comes outta the journal and all the other outlets singing from the same script. Money most be worth it, won’t last long.
Blah blah blah is right…..Go talk to the Chinese & American’s first
@Christopher Byrne: yep, and then we’ll be fed the same BS that the smallest countries must lead by example first.
according to the ESB data centres use 1/3 of the grids capacity. we bow to america all the time,,,banking crises, housing crises, homelessness, i think they global mind is changing and corporates with larger finances than countries are eventually gonna get reigned in. ofc we are gonna be the last to do it as usual. gombeen politics.
@Mick Heery: I understand that DC’s use a lot, but, do you have a link for the above claim of 1/3rd usage please?
The fact that Ireland has yet to switch to E10 petrol is very telling as to the seriousness of our climate strategy. Literally the lowest hanging fruit, it would remove the emissions equivalent of 100,000 cars off the road practically at the stroke of a pen. If we can’t do something that simple, I’m not sure we’re up to the more serious tasks..
Completely shutting down the import of UK car market totally contradicts govs emission fairytales since local consumer can not get a cleaner – newer car that falls under low co2 regulations from abroad (Since UK is the ONLY AND CLOSEST PLACE where wheel ks right-handed) leaving Irish motorists to use the old diesel engined cars since the car prices are sky high on the island.
The first thing that needs to happen is that people’s attitude needs to change so that they genuinely care and are motivated to make changes to support these goals..
I honestly believe that all the talk in this article will not make people care and threats will only make people do the opposite.
Governments here have a very poor track record on bringing people together as one Nation.
@Roger Bond: people’s attitudes will only change when they see politicians stop squandering billions on every single development they touch.
Start producing results. Not just throwing more taxes at people with no end result visible.
Personally I am more concerned about affording to put fuel in my car, getting appointments at hospital and paying my mortgage.
Regarding climate change I’m inclined to listen to someone who has seen it first hand & that’s David Attenborough, he has said due to climate change & it causing methane gas immissions there’s going to be at least 4/5 viruses per annum!
@Colette Kearns: Sir David frederick attenborough collette. Agree
“Climate Experts” … well. Looking through the history of mankind, the “Climate Experts” helped the society to deal with changes to the climate. They didn’t have computers or smartphones, but an open mind and common sense.
But now that we are in the days of “peoplekind”, our experts are more like the experts of the Aztecs. When the climate changed back in their days, their answer was to kill thousands in order to please their gods, so they’d stop the climate change.
I don’t want to hear another squeak about Planning for more big wind and solar, without first hearing all about the Planning for how they intend filling in the big intermittency gaps. Massive electrolysis plants here or there. Mega grid all over the place.
In reality though all this carbon account game, is just that, a silly game. The only way we will solve this problem is by fighting it as a Warming World War. We need the military industrial combines to stop making weapons and instead make thousands of new generation SMRs. and let the Australians make the fuel for them, instead of exporting vast quantities of coal.
More methane is already boiling out of the permafrost, than from a billion more cows. What the hell are we on about. If we could solve the problem by virtue signalling, it would be solved long ago.
@Nicholas Grubb: I agree…last night on Eirgrids dashboard there was nearly 4000MW of wind available but the grid could only absorb 2000MW so nearly 2000MW of wind power had to be turned off all night but the wind turbine owners still get paid for the curtailment.
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