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I AM A primary school teacher working in South Dublin trying my best to teach my 28 senior infants remotely. I live with my 17-year-old son. He is a 5th-year student.
Adjusting to a new regime and remote online learning, there was initially a period of frustration and uncertainty for both of us. A learning curve for teachers, students and parents everywhere. We have found the new normal for us, for now.
My Mam will be 93 years old in July and is currently living through this coronavirus lockdown in a Dublin nursing home. She’s there since 6 March, that’s over 80 days.
A proud woman
She’s a Ringsend girl and is extremely proud of her roots. She lived with me for four years before finally moving to the nursing home. Mam has many ailments, the most noticeable one currently is her depression.
Whilst lockdown came early and promptly for those in nursing home settings, the sector, as we now know, was one of the last to receive prompt and adequate testing, an adequate supply of PPE equipment and staffing pressures relating to the pandemic. We, the families, were all terrified.
Many nursing homes worked tirelessly on their own initiative to ensure the physical safety of their residents and staff. These nursing homes are to be highly praised for their Herculean efforts to protect our loved ones.
Sadly, we are all too aware of the many hundreds of older nursing home residents who lost their lives due to Covid-19, and the struggles and heartache for the affected families. We can’t even begin to imagine what they have been through.
Their wellbeing matters
It is absolutely imperative that we continue to protect the physical health of this vulnerable group in society, but we must also address the huge forgotten issue - safeguarding their mental health.
Issues such as loneliness, anxiety, confusion, worry and depression are all very real emotions experienced by older people, particularly during these unprecedented times, but especially for those who live in nursing homes away from family and friends who would normally visit them.
My Mam finds it difficult to understand why she can’t simply sit with her family and friends on the grounds of the nursing home. She is weary of this daily waving through the window at me and having to get the staff to help her answer her mobile phone.
I have heard the same from other relatives of the nursing home residents, some who don’t go to wave as they know their loved one will be then confused and expecting them to come in and visit, or take them out for a walk.
Some are unable to use mobile phones without assistance, or to just call their families whenever they feel like. It is also impacting on the mental health of husbands, wives, partners or children of those in nursing homes, not just the residents themselves. I am in contact with many such families and the stress and anxiety levels have been high for all those going through this awful ordeal.
Mam and I have talked about all the restrictions. She finds it all hard to comprehend. “It’s worse than World War II” she says, and she should know. My Mam has been depressed and sick in recent weeks and the distancing from her family and regular visitors has played its part in her current depressive episode. This could be easily resolved for her and others with some access to loved ones. Mam is out of sync, as are many of the residents in every nursing home nationwide.
A possible solution
I have been thinking about nursing homes all through this and how they work, the care they provide. I have come up with a proposal for social distancing visits to nursing homes and I hope the authorities will consider this approach. I have written to all relevant bodies.
In many nursing homes there are gardens, outdoor spaces, where it would be feasible to timetable visits with our loved ones with the help of the nursing home staff, with social distancing in place and the use of face masks, and to have some physical face-to-face conversations with them, to reassure them, comfort them, to let them know they are loved and important to us.
Setting up a system like this is surely possible at this stage, now that we have flattened the curve of this disease? The population is familiar with social distancing now and has learned to work with it, and I believe families of residents would work well with nursing home staff to implement this timetabled type of visitation.
The time is right now for thinking of the residents who really need contact with loved ones, even at a distance. I was heartened to read last night that Dr Tony Holohan was open to considering creative ways to facilitate visits in the coming weeks.
Myself, my family and friends, and those I know who also have loved ones in nursing homes would like our voices heard. We want to pressurise the Government, Nursing Homes Ireland, the HSE, NPHET and all the health experts and the media to begin the discussions. We insist that action be taken now, not in a further phase in August. These discussions need to be the top priority on the agenda at NPHET meetings.
I have heard rumours that talks are due to take place when it comes to opening visitation to nursing homes, and Dr Holohan’s comments last night were welcome, but we have had little or no feedback from all the sectors we contacted. Waiting for future re-opening ‘phases’ to implement any imaginative visiting measures in nursing homes will be too late, I believe.
Many of our loved ones have died from Covid-19, that’s true, but I believe many more will die of loneliness by then, they will simply give up. We will continue to be their advocates and we will continue to campaign on their behalf until visits in some format are permitted soon.
Before now, no one has wanted to talk about nursing homes in Ireland. It is one of the frustrating reflections of our healthcare system. Yesterday’s exchanges in the Dáil at least shone a light on the sector. There have been far too many deaths in these homes because of this coronavirus. We are afraid to talk about it, but it’s important that we do, it is incumbent on all of us as a society to find a solution quickly, so we can resume our visits to relatives.
As it currently stands nursing homes residents have to endure another 11 weeks of lockdown without visitors. How would any other individual or group feel about this restriction? We talk about the mental health of the youth, the teenagers and other groups throughout this whole pandemic and rightly so, but can we now afford older people the same respect?
Last night I spoke to my aunt who is also in a nursing home on the north side of Dublin city. She said that other residents in her nursing home were afraid. “They are afraid they will be dead before they get to see anybody”.
There may come a time when you or I will face a period of our lives in nursing homes. As a friend of mine said we need to help ease this transition for all our citizens in the same humane way. We are pleading with the powers that be to find a new normal for our loved ones in nursing homes, urgently.
Therese Bruton is a teacher living in Dublin.
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Couldn’t agree more. The impact of not seeing loved ones is going to be hugely damaging for residents. My grandmother has gone downhill since this started. She would have had a visitor nearly every day. She can’t watch tv or read a book due to mild dementia. She’s essentially looking at four walls all day every day now and has had a number of falls. I think the homes need to facilitate visits in the garden ASAP, especially given the good weather. We can refrain from touching but even for her to see her grandchild would give her so much joy.
This is not an easy one to call. But I’m siding with the author on this. Cant help thinking that insurance is playing a big part in decisions being made along with safety and already private nursing homes have a lot of questions to answer. If it were me I’d want to care for them in my own home but not everyone can manage that.
my mother is in a nursing home in the uk the home locked down in the start of march no visitors. no cases so far.
My mother who will be 93 in July is in a nursing home in Sandymount and they have been in lockdown since March. They had 1 suspected case which necessitated all residents being convined to their rooms for a 2 week period whilst awaiting results which thankfully were negative. My mother found this incredibly difficult as she suffers from depression but I feel they had no other solution. The staff bring her to the window twice a week and we have a 30 minute slot with her. One of the staff has being putting her hair colour in for her which she is delighted with. They obviously cant have their usual activities which necessitate people coming in but they are being brought out to the garden and kept at a distance from each other. We also ring a couple of times a week and the staff pass their mobile to her as she does not use a phone. I certainly feel they have handled the situation well. I appreciate the mental repercussions for some people but safety is the main concern for all. I think we will get to visit soon under strict conditions. I’m very grateful to the staff in this home for their vigilance during this pandemic.
This is a very well written article. It conveys the sentiments of so many. I think that the proposal of schdueled social distanced outdoor visits makes a lot of sense and I hope that those in authority take heed and are proactive sooner rather than later.
What a stupid article all of a sudden now we must hurry things up , as a FRONTLINE worker the last thing I want is members of the public dropping in …. People still not listening
Yes
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