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THE MAN WHO was the subject of a homophobic slur in a shop on Dublin’s Baggot Street has spoken out about the incident.
Yesterday Colm, who does not want to reveal his surname, posted an update to Facebook where he described how two customers in a Spar called him “a faggot” because of the way he was dressed.
The shop assistant came to his aid and refused to serve the man who insulted him.
In an interview with The OutMost, Colm said that his status was not meant for public consumption and admitted that he chose his words badly.
The post was shared by his friend, drag performer Panti Bliss, leading to it going viral and #SparGuy starting to trend on Twitter.
“I wrote that status when I was walking out of Spar, and hadn’t given too thought to it. My facebook feed isn’t even public. Only friends can see what I post and I did not write a piece for the public eye. Someone screen grabbed it and shared it,” he said.
“The guy was asked to leave. The whole thing happened in about 8 to 10 seconds, like it was so small. But I was so impressed by the Spar guy and I thanked him and bought my stuff.”
Colm said that since the story went viral, he’s received several homophobic messages.
I have suspended getting messages from people I am not Facebook friends with, because I have been getting messages from strangers saying that I was ‘oversensitive’, I ‘brought it on myself’, that I was ‘making the story up’. Some were threatening violence and suggesting that I kill myself.
Spar has tweeted about the incident, saying they are “very proud” of how the assistant handled the situation.
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Amazing how horrible people can be over a keyboard?!?!?
People are only brave when they have a keyboard to hide behind, or better yet, a mob. I doubt most would say this to his face.
Poor guy, hope he’s ok
You people need to be clearer about who exactly you’re sympathising with and/or angry at.
Just to avoid any ambiguity, I mean you Ailbhe, Diarmaid and to a lesser extent John.
It’s a general statement about anybody that posts offensive or abusive stuff online. Generally they’re only brave when they are behind the keyboard.
I wasn’t aware that the comments policy didn’t allow general opinions.
John great abs.fancy a drink? :)
Close scrutiny of the comments policy reveals that while contributors are permitted to express general opinions they are forbidden from doing so using singular pronouns such as “he” and “his”.
Sure…….
Eh, Ailbhe – did you read any of the story? They did say it to his face. There was no keyboard involved. It happened in person – in a Spar, in fact.
My comment was just a joke about being horrible over a keyboard in response to Johns comment about people being horrible over a keyboard.
Not a popular one
Actually Andy the article makes reference to messages he has received since about being over sensitive and even saying he should commit suicide. So ye Ailbhe is right. On a continuing point who seriously tells someone to go kill themselves? What kind of person do you have to be to do that? Fair enough tell then to go f themselves or whatever as a slur but to actually say go kill yourself? It seems to be modern Internet/troll/bully thing but man it’s really f-ed up.
Thanks Barry, got there before me. The article refers to messages he has received via social media. Not said to his face. Maybe you need to read it again!
soooo totally agree with you on that one!!!
Hey Spar Guy-you’re a Star Guy! Well done!
Well done to the store worker for making a stand.
It was baggot street. Tesco is almost next door!
What’s a Scaldy hun ?
According to Panti Bliss “Hun is a slang term ( particularly among the gays ) for a particular kind of working class Dublin girl”.
You couldn’t make it up. Hurtful ‘slang’ terms seem to be okay when it’s gay people using them to describe others, but outrage ensues when they are subjected to same.
To be fair, once someone calls you a fagg0t it’s basically ok to call them anything you want. And you don’t need to be gay.
I think you miss the key difference. In one case a pair of homophobes set out to publicly humiliate an identifiable person because of his sexuality. In the other, that person vented privately at two unidentifiable homophobes who can hide behind their anonymity to avoid humiliation.
“I think you miss the key difference”
No I don’t. I just find it amusing and ironic that people feel it’s okay to use hurtful terms (whether publicly or privately) to describe one group of people while at the same time getting their knickers in a knot whenever others use an equally hurtful term to describe them or the group they belong to.
What a complete non-story the whole thing is anyway.
Seriously,I’m confused ..What does the scaldy mean ? Thank you Mart.
A scaldy hun is a scaldy hun
You choose to ignore the key difference then.
Ben scaldy would usually mean something along the lines of dirty or rotten or perhaps seedy.
He’s essentially calling her a dirty working class Dublin woman. Classist an sexist in one insult, good effort.
@Cian – She’s called him a faggot. I think we can safely say the kid gloves are well and truly off.
Actually according to the post the girl said nothing.
Scaldy means skinny unkept trying to something your not look.
Really? I’ve always been called a hun for being a protestant. If I’d know they were calling me a working class girl I’d have been much angrier.
Eh, I think he was tame with the name calling. They called him a f#@#*t! If I was his pal, and had witnessed this, that girl would have gotten worse then “Scaldy hun” from me!
well said ,, if a faggot , is a faggot then it means he is a faggot.. dressing like that his father should a knocked the bollix out of him .. or should I say kick him in his vadginna .. sick weirdos ..
Well done SparGuy!
It reminds me of something similar that happened at that same Spar shop more than 20 years ago. A friend of mine was wearing a ‘hunting cap’ style hat with flaps that covered the ears against the chilly wind when he was questioned by a young man begging outside…
‘Is that hat warm?’, asks the beggar
‘Actually, yes thanks, it’s very warm.’, replies my friend.
‘Good’, says the begger, ‘because it looks f*cking stupid’.
No loose change for him.
Cos that’s comparable to a homophobic abuse story.
Run along, Jason. TheScore is missing it’s eejit.
D4 guy and scalds hun were probably going to go kn**ker drinking down by the railway line while rolling a few spliffs. ..
Totes!!!!!
I don’t know how he was being “over sensitive” about the Spar guy not tolerating homophobia, or how he “brought it on himself” for wearing shorts. Some people go through such effort to find a conspiracy in everything these days.
Hope the D4 head and his scaldy girlfriend have got the message.
Well done Spar worker.
Yeah don’t mess with the gays or they will use social media to incite waaay more hatred than the initial commenter did in the spar.
Hypocrisy much?
Or treat other people with a bit of respect and you won’t have to worry about any negative consequences of your own actions? Just because you think its hilarious to make fun of someone, doesn’t mean that the rest of society agrees with you? Something along those lines maybe Isaac?
What did his girlfriend do to deserve everybody’s wrath? It’s hardly her fault that her other half is a gobdeen.
Yeah threaten me ya cowards and see what happens. Get a life and leave this young lad alone you bunch bullies. Gets my blood boiling. The guy who called him that and made sure he heard it should be ashamed of himself. Like the ones sending threatening messages to him now. Bunch of cowards. Don’t be worrying film and nothing wrong wear what you want feck the haters none of their goddamn businessman they are probably same types who think if a woman wears a mini she was asking to be raped. Be proud and dontblet anyone get you down ever! Remember bullies can’t stand it when people ignore them!
Oh, I love riddles!
Didn’t take long for Panti to chime in on it for a bit of PR.
After recent events Panti is considered a major spokesperson for gay rights.
Do you make the same stupid comments when other activists for various causes speak out?
A major spokesperson for promoting his book, more like.
Is it not ‘her’ book that ‘he’ is promoting?
Maybe it’s his book, she is promoting. He didn’t right it in drag.
I need to learn how to *write.
In fairness what was he expecting if he dresses like that
Because you have a right to comment on how someone else dresses? How about I tell you those clothes youre wearing makes you look like a clown? Complete stranger in shop I am. Cop on
For people to respectfully mind their own business? Too much to ask these days?
How bout a modicum of people minding their own business? No?
Hmm, respect? Nope not that one either.
Common decency? Nah not a hope.
Do you question what female victims of rape were wearing too?
Haha Steve being called a nasty name is in no way comparable to rape! C’mon Man.
I agree cian but the concept of victim blaming (whether it’s rape, homophobia, workplace bullying or just good ole assault) is to my mind, relevant.
So there is a spectrum regarding reactions to clothing? It’s ok to call a fella in short shorts a faggot but not to rape a woman in short shorts. Have you heard the term slippery slope?
I didn’t mean he deserved to be called a faggot but going out in winter in short shorts in Dublin is going to provoke a reaction, whether it’s right or wrong, it will..
Kev of course it’s going to provoke a reaction and I’d imagine that’s why someone would dress like that to “make a statement”.
Steve last time I checked using nasty language is not a crime however rape is.
So are you saying the fault is with Colm for not taking into consideration the reaction of a nasty homophobe?
Most people in the Western world consider themselves to have freedom. Seems that freedom is very narrowly defined.
Could they at least provide a photo of the outfit that the person was wearing ,and also a photo of that ignorant yob that called him a faggot?!
Steve I’ve no idea what you’re on about all I’m saying is that if someone goes out in a pair of short shorts (male, female, gay, straight, dog, cat) in late November in Ireland I’d imagine they are doing so to make a statement.
A photo of the outfit actually really would help to flesh out the story.
Are you slow? It’s been established more than once that the term “faggot” is way more than a nasty name. It is in fact a hate crime, unless you also consider terms like “ni**er” also merely a nasty name also.
I’d imagine you do actually have the right to comment, disparagingly or otherwise, on others dress. There’s a grey area as to when it turns into verbal abuse or harassment but it’s pretty black and white that you have to be a completely irredeemable pr!ck to do so.
There’s a difference between commenting on a person’s clothes and commenting on the person.
“he must be cold” is totally different to “look at the faggot in the shorts”.
What is it that you can’t see about that?
The difference is obvious. However i’m still pretty certain that you have a right to make either comment even if it takes a complete arsehole to do it.
Depends on what you think entitled means.
Rights come with responsibilities. (e.g right to free speech and responsibility to use it wisely)
That could be construed as incitement to hatred. Which is (as far as I’m aware) a crime.
At the very least it’s deplorable language which shouldn’t be tolerated.
And thanks to Spar Guy it wasn’t tolerated and the right to refuse service was exercised.
Ya, there is an interesting debate to be had on incitement.
The statute forbids it
“if the written material, words, behaviour, visual images or sounds, as the case may be, are threatening, abusive or insulting and are intended or, having regard to all the circumstances, are likely to stir up hatred”
It could be construed as such. Personally, i’m not sure that i’m comfortable with the wording of that law.
I would remove the insulting bit and change it so it read “stir up hatred of a person or people with the goal of inciting violence”.
In it’s current form, it could be abused to prevent the criticism of ideas and beliefs, specifically religious ones, due to the “offensive nature” of such criticisms.
Well using a word like faggot is most definitely abusive at least.
So I’d say it qualifies. I’m not trying to curtail free speech. Just pointing out that it is not an unqualified right. It does have limitations and rules and the argument could be made that this guy broke the rules.
Ideally it would never come up because people would have the common sense not to verbally abuse someone based on their guess at their sexual orientation based on what they are wearing.
But if someone is silly enough to do that, there has to be a framework to handle it.
Under the current law, it could definitely be argued.
I’d agree that the right to free speech has to be limited but I would think that it would need to be proved that he was attempting to stir up hatred of the other customer with the intent of inciting violence.
I mean, if hatred is enough in itself, then the number of phrases that are banned becomes quite broad and dangerous.
A law banning incitement to hatred is nice if it applied sensibly. Whether or not it is or will be I couldn’t say.
All fair points and I totally agree.
Sean how can it be “free” speech if it has limitations?
Every right has limitations. Those limitations apply when you use your right to impinge on others rights.
Ok cian what would you call it?
Because we can’t libel someone, we can’t perjure ourselves, we can’t report things that didn’t happen, we can’t incite violence or hatred.
This isn’t a new law, it’s how things are and have been for centuries.
I’d still call it free speech as in “you’re free to say whatever you want, with these obvious exceptions.”
Since when have two clowns insulting each other been news?
Facebook should be banned. I once made a crass comment whilst drunk, on a cousin’s photo at 3am and was so mortified the day after. I thought it was funny at the time but the alcohol had made me forget who exactly could read it . At least I wasn’t catapluted into the public eye! Think before you type…actually, alcohol should also be banned…
Jesus Art… your own cousin.
Cutting edge reporting from the Journal.
Do you force yourself to read it?
To me, this news story is more relevant than most of what you see on the front page of the newspaper. It reflects the change (for the better) in our society’s attitudes towards people who are different.
If you’re the kind of person who insults random people in Spar, then reading a news story like this might help you to understand that it’s not nice and that a lot of people are horrified by something you (bizarrely) think is ok.
If you’re someone who has been insulted like this, the story might reassure you that society doesn’t approve of what was said to you and there are some people out there who are willing to stand up against it.
Most importantly, if you’re _anyone_ that sees someone using homophobic insults against others, this story is here to remind you that you should tell them it’s wrong.
Zozzy it’s an entire article on some guy gettin called a nasty name. I’m sure if they went to a local primary school they could fill a weeks worth of articles on people being called hurtful names.
Cian, it’s not about some guy being called a hurtful name. It’s about somebody taking a strong stand against that and the company backing it up. Maybe read it again.
Ha says your one who’s nattering on above like the story is about some keyboard warriors?!
Number of times a stranger has shouted at me that I’m a gaylord: 1,000,000
Number of times a stranger has stood up and said that it’s wrong: 0
That’s why it’s news, Cian.
The difference is, primary school children are children. They are not fully socialised, and any one rational doesn’t think that a child has full autonomy, or, indeed, responsibility. That’s part of the reason of having an education system in the first place.
In the case of those making homophobic comments, well, obviously their socialisation hasn’t worked, but if they are adults, they need to take responsibility for their actions.
Oh Cian, I’m morto for ya. It mentions people abusing him via social media. You clearly haven’t a clue what you are talking about. I’m really embarrassed for ya…..poor lamb
Ailbhe I can sense your level of maturity just oozing through that comment.
And a comment starting with ‘Ha days your on’ is the height of maturity.
I think you’re avoiding the fact that you didn’t know what you were talking about and made an embarrassing error. It’s ok, happens the best of us Cian.
Oh the poor gay community story of the day, one, two, three, aaaaawwwwww……..
Wow.
I get that you might have issues with marriage equality. But what objection could you possibly have to this?
Story prob made up, O2 uk….? The journal always seeking sympathy for homo community
Troy, do you think that someone from the UK screenshooting something is evidence of something being made up?
That’s pretty extreme…
For the record, I tend to think the phrase homo community seems a little derisive. Were you trying to be offensive?
Also this a human interest story…
You really seem to have a problem with gay people.
What the proper title then so, someone else stated that they felt lbgt community was not correct title, someone was offended at being called gay people, what the proper title then???
Homo, is almost always deemed to be offensive.
Some people may feel that gay or lgbt doesn’t adequately capture something. But Homo is perceived to be (and I believe in your case intended to be) offensive.
Sean – stop feeding the anonymous, faceless, Twitter troll. If he actually had balls, he’d be using his real name & photo; but he doesn’t, because he’s not.
Yeah maybe…
Thing is he claims not to be homophobic, so I’m presuming there’s something behind all this. So I’m curious, if he isn’t homophobic what’s the reasoning behind this stuff.
But it seems that asking questions of him doesn’t yield anything other than insults and vague tinfoil hat stuff.
I feel more comfortable expressing my opinion, and participating in constructive dabate, without fear of being hunted down by gay promotion maniacs….!
Who said anything about hunting down? Where is this unfounded fear coming from?
I haven’t asked any personal details about you. I’ve only asked you to explain your views.
You’re anonymous, you have no face, name or anything. What makes you think anyone can find you.
So… Can you please engage with the points rather than raising all these false flags.
Listen if you just think gay people or gay sex or the predisposition to like Madonna is a bit weird or icky or in poor musical taste… Just say it. Honestly, just say it.
I don’t care what anyone says, it is NOT ok in this day and age to call anyone a “Faggot”! It is right up there with calling a coloured person a “N€&&@r”"! Yes, I’m using the word (well actually I’m not cos it won’t pass the language filter) now on the journal to emphasise my point!
You simply do not use either terms in decent society!
Be a homophobe, but keep your bigotry to yourself like you do your racism!!!
I reserve the right to refer to bundles of twigs as faggots. In these straitened times, and with the dark winter night drawing in, one must be allowed to share tips on foraging to heat one’s home!
Eh pretty sure saying coloured isn’t PC.
@Colm
I have many friends and colleagues who are guy and lesbian, to those who abuse you are only showing themselves up.
Fair play to the Spar guy just wish I was there to help him from the shop.
Stay strong
Colm is guy how somebody from d4 pronounces gay !!!!
Only messing much respect to the spar worker ! Scaldy Hun is a new one on me …..
This is a made up story. Nobody in Spar Baggot st can vouch for it. And they can’t find it on CCTV.
Interesting…
Got a link to where that claim is made?
Sean you always seek proof over rationale, you must have loved the x files, the truth is out there, of course this is fake story, set up to make everyone feel sorry for homo community, all seeking attention, and shove their gayness in other peoples faces, e.g gay pride bullshi…..!
Troyman, are you really disputing the fact that people seek out evidence? Are you saying this is a bad thing?
Almost every aspect of your life is defined by science, an evidence based system.
Wow….
There really is some pretty obvious hatred there.
I am looking for anything to back up the information that a widely accepted story, which has been commented on by Spar itself is made up. I don’t think that that’s unreasonable. But then again maybe you’re right.
Maybe it is mental of me to expect that outlandish claims that fly in the face of fact can be backed up.
For someone who uses phrases like homo and gay pride bullshit with such ease you seem to find it very difficult to believe that there is any homophobia in Ireland.
I really thought you might have been a reasonable person. Seems I was wrong.
You must have a keyboard man, I wouldn’t have da patients to construct that paragraph on me I-phone….! Yo Ailbhe, what up….
Yo Troyman, your hatred is kinda scary. Are ya ok? Do you need to talk about it?
Ah cool, so we’re just ignoring all the points made?
Grand job. I’ll presume that’s because you have nothing to add to it.
Ok Ailbhe, this one time when I was a kid, I went to the beach, I built a sand castle, it was brill, but then the tide came in and ruined it, ruined it I tell ya, Sean don’t worry be happy…!
And the ocean was gay and now you hate ‘the gays’. Ah I get it now. Totally justifiable. Damn gay ocean. Full of gay sharks (dolphins, trust me I’m a scientist).
An unpleasent girl
Why? She didn’t say anything.
This news?
Me Tarzan?
I went to the Spar to get a few messages
A packet of rashers and a pound of sausages
Dressed to kill in my shorts and wooly jumper
I came across a homophobe and his skanger
Jumper doesn’t rhyme with Skanger, and the last 2 lines don’t flow at all – too many syllables in line 3 compared with line 4. You fail, Coolio.
Thank you very much, Andy
I found that lesson very handy
I shall now give up this rhyming game
My head bowed down in eternal shame
In fairness, the sophisticates among us know that poetry doesn’t have to rhyme.
Terrible, terrible. I myself have been subjected to homophobic abuse, even though I’m not even a gay. My heart goes out to the lad who wants to dress up as Daisy Duke in November. Some people have no manners
Why does it say O2-UK in the top corner?
At a guess, the person who took the screenshot lives or was in the UK at the time?
Is there an implication there?
The implication was it was the only thing interesting I found about the article Sean.
Someone being North of the border or a boat away is interesting?
Fair enough.
Who was up north or across the water Sean? What were they doing taking screenshots of conversations between flamboyant homosexuals, scaldy Huns,D4 heads and sound spar guys Sean??
I want answers!!!!
I want the truth!!!
The ghost of liberace?
The worlds gone mad
Why would you call anyone a bundle of sticks?
Maybe im getting this wrong but in Ireland people call people faggots even if there not gay, its just part of our strange irish humour.
I have been called worst, but it wasnt ment seriously.
Might be one of those habits we should all get out of then perhaps? I don’t think anyones life would be negatively affected if they stopped using the term “faggot” so casually, but I can think of a significant proportion of society whose lives would be made at least a little bit easier if we made that small little change! A big positive outcome, and very little effort required.
This spar guy showed immense courage in dealing with this ignorant ass and his scoldey girlfriend too many people turn away and don’t want to get involved in any type of situation, they sounded like two horrible individuals and well suited, you know what they say, there’s a lid for every pot and this pot is complete, maybe there kids will be subjected to the same kind of treatment in the future & see how they will feel.
Nice one,
You get outraged at an insult being thrown, yet you deem it acceptable to throw one straight back at a bystander in the incident.
You also seem to be taking pleasure in the thought that their made up children might be insulted one day…. Strange
its always a stupid scaldy that ruins everybody’s fun
When games like this one can make it onto Google Play, then these attitudes will continue, sadly, for some time.
http://www.huffingtonpost.co.uk/2014/11/24/ass-hunters-google-play-homophobic-game_n_6211128.html?1416837402
And I for one support Spar Guy (and the poor guy who was abused while buying groceries).
how do u know they were D4 heads they could have been prats from anywhere .in a d4 shop like u
Boycott Spar.
Cannot believe this guy is getting abuse for the soft terms he used, when re-telling his story. He was called a fa@#ot, by two people in a shop. If I was his pal, and had witnessed this, I’d have called them alot worse then “Scaldy huns”. Poor fella.
“Scaldy hun girlfriend”
LOL
The gay guy in question was wearing a wolly jumper and ‘short shorts’. I just spoke to a gay guy and he told me the reason he wore that outfit was on purpose, so that the wolly jumper would hang down and cover his ‘short shirts’ and make it look like he wasn’t wearing any underwear at all, just a jumper with nothing underneath. Very appropriate for midday in the local supermarket.
If I saw a girl walk into a shop with the same outfit on, I wouldn’t call her a faggot, id call her a sad desperate insecure case for trying to get people to look at her and boost her confidence in the meantime. Well done gays!!
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